this past week

I've had a lot of fun teaching art to all the kids I don't normally have, so my little country school can graduate its seniors (because they have to have an art credit to graduate and the super intendent prefers to keep not one, but three FFA teachers on staff rather than a liberal arts teacher. Nathan has seemed to drop as far as he can go though, so walking around school was difficult (my tummy is now resting, seriously RESTING, on the tops of my legs) and it is making me worried that I won't be able to work my last two weeks. So tonight, I'm planning out everything I can and trying to get the yearbook finished, just in case I have to stay home. I would be a little sad to not have my students for these last two weeks, but then, it would be a little nice too. ;)

checking out the maternity ward

is a little scary.
Both Andy and I had deer-in-the-headlights looks on our faces because actually being in the hospital, and pressing the button to be admitted into the room, and looking at the birthing room with the weird bed, and the surgery room with the weird equipment, and being told way too much information, and filling out your son's birth certificate, is all a little overwhelming.

I was scared the second I sat in one of the recovery rooms with a nurse to fill out paper work. Andy was scared the second he was in the birthing room, which I understand, because actually thinking about watching your spouse go through pain, while being told how it is your job to go get me jello and sprite, and how you can sleep on the fold-out couch in the room (all while praying that the baby doesn't come until you've finished your thesis), must be a little freaky. The nurse even showed us how they dim the lights once mommy (me in this case) begins to push. Why then I wonder? I thought it was the part of labor right before pushing that was the worst.

Anyway, I'm sure no trip to the hospital will quite be like the one today. We'll probably both be scared when we actually go, but, I hope, not quite so scared.

vienna-sausage toes

I four weeks left! Or six, if God thinks I can handle it, but I might be irritated at him... (did you hear that?). My feet, and therefore toes, are so swollen that they look like a fat baby's feet. You know where you can't see your ankles at all, nor the fine bones that usually show at the tops of your feet?
And I'm getting so excited about holding Nathan and all that comes with having him outside my body that I'm reading every little sign my body gives and hoping that it means I'm going to labor in the next ten minutes. It's silly, a little frustrating, and a little fun. Oh, and only fifteen teaching days left for me.... FIFTEEN!

"Just because you're pregnant doesn't mean you have to eat like a horse."

These words of wisdom coming from a sixteen year old punk who spends all of 45 minutes with me whining about my forcing him to learn. Whew! He's lucky that end-of-the-pregnancy nasty attitude I've heard of hasn't come (except when I'm sleepy), because I might have said something back. Luckily, two days later, he came in to my class with his skin as orange as a baby who eats only carrots. Apparently, his "buddy convinced" him to go tanning. Suuuuuuure.

I've finally gotten stretch marks on my belly. It was a sad morning when I woke up and saw that ten or so magically appeared. It made me sad, because I was proud of my smooth, hard, pregnant belly, even if only Andy and I saw it, and now it is marred with purple streaks. At least I've read that they'll fade eventually. I am getting sick of carrying around this extra weight though. And I feel bad about complaining about it when I wanted it so much, but lately I have been feeling pretty puny.
My feet and hands get swollen (but my blood pressure is usually low, so apparently it isn't a problem except that it hurts), my stomach hurts a lot, and I feel queasy. I've also been blessed with some Braxton Hicks (thank you Dr. Tom, for not calling them fake, but instead saying, "so you've begun getting contractions.") which gives you shots of pain at the top of your belly that quickly moved down. And menstrual-like cramps. I almost forgot what those felt like and so I had to give a few thanks for the lack of a period for the past eight months.
I know that these pre-labor contractions don't do much to dilate me, and therefore move me toward the finish line, but I'm hoping they will soon and that Nathan won't decide that he wants to linger in mommy's warm water-bath.

seven weeks and counting

YAY! Because I'm starting to feel like a whale. I just had the best haircut of my life and the stylist was this tall waif-like beauty and she made me feel even more huge. Then, I had to get a new license (because my preggo brain made me lose mine) and, of course, take a new picture and I realized how much my face has swelled. Probably no one else would notice, but I do. I can't wait to have Nathan out and to start breastfeeding to shed these extra pounds. Seriously, I feel like crying or stamping my feet in a full scale temper tantrum.

The good news is that Dr. Karns told me that he thinks Nathan may have turned, which means he may not be breeched any longer. If the doc thinks he turned back, or if he still isn't positive, he said I'll have an ultrasound in four weeks (yay getting to see Nathan again, boo $$) to make sure. If he is breech, they'll turn him. I really don't want that to happen, because apparently it hurts A LOT. But I'm hopeful that the boy has done yet another somersault. I can't wait to wrestle with my little man... or at least hold him.

all mixed up

This is not what I was thinking of talking about -- but it just popped in my head when I wrote the title.
I really like phrasal verbs. If you don't know what those are, they are these slang-like terms we use all the time where you have a verb followed by word that looks like a preposition but acts like an adverb, and therefore can't be separated from the verb (because adverbs modify, or give you more information about, verbs (and other things)). So to give you some examples: mixed up, put up, show up, run into, run away, turn on, and flip off. Do you see how these combos can have different meanings if used in a different way?
Example:
Bob ran up the hill. In this sentence Bob physically ran up, so it is a verb followed by a prepositional phrase.
Bob ran up the bill. In this sentence Bob isn't physically running up the bill, he is instead, making too many purchases! So this is a verb/adverb combo, which is called, by grammarians, a phrasal verb.
And I like the nouns that are essentially phrasal verbs, like, "throw up."

Okay. What I was planning on writing about were my mixed emotions about going back to school in about fourteen hours. I am glad that I don't despise my job, because I have despised jobs in the past and in one case cried when I went to work, and in another had to sing "If we make it to December" by Merle Haggard just to get me through (because I was quitting to move to Oklahoma in December).

But I don't want to go back. I've used my spring break to catch up on sleep and I'm still so tired and I become weary when I think of all the things I need to get done in eight very short weeks. I actually like my job and my students, and sometimes I even enjoy teaching (that's the rare and wonderful occasion that a sixteen year old gives a crap about learning). But I wish I could stay at home, make dinner every night as I have been and not be in a rush, not be worn out from putting up with kids who hate school, and simply prepare for the move and for Nathan's arrival.

I have organized and prepared his room as much as I can with what I have -- even though it will only be his room for a month (or less depending when he comes), I wanted to make it as much of a nursery as I could. I put all the adorable things my mom made for him (just wait until I post pictures of these things) in there and I set his books and diapers nicely on a bookshelf. And I put his stuffed animals and toys in a big basket my sister-in-law gave me. And I organized all the clothes I have by size and season, put them in zip lock bags, and labeled them for easy access (and so I felt like I was doing something).

Wow, I finally ran out of things to say. Or my brain went blank again.

spring break or "the best-laid plans of mice and men..."

"... often go awry."
I had just glorious schemes for getting projects done during spring break. Now it is almost over and all I've done is sleep, eat, cook, and research diapers (there is a lot of info out there -- I promise this was my one worthy task). But I meant to finish not one, but two sewing projects, pack up the house, get the Wellston yearbook completely planned out, and my last eight teaching weeks fully planned (just in case little buddy comes a little sooner -- did you hear that, Nathan?).
It is so nice outside today that I think I may get out and do a little yard work, even though that isn't one of the planned projects.

Nathan is moving like a hyper-active kid again the past two days. He is constantly wiggling around (and I'm glad, because he's breached and I want him to work himself to a better position) and moving my stomach like a person wiggling jello. Andy finally saw some of this action last night and was appropriately freaked out. It makes me laugh whenever Andy sees it, and it makes me happy whenever I see it on my own (like now). I'm having a lot of back pain now though, and it is mostly because it takes so much effort for me to get up from a sitting position, to bend down, and to do things (like the dishes) that require me to bend because my belly is too far out for me to reach the faucet and sink otherwise.

This past weekend was my baby shower and it wasn't as embarrassing as I thought it would be. In fact, there was such a whirlwind of presents that I kind of lost track and began worrying that my guests were bored to death. Later that night I went home and sorted through everything and it made me feel much more prepared for Nathan's arrival. I like to plan things way in advance (I normally have Christmas planned in the summer) and I haven't been able to do much of that until now. I still can't really set up a nursery, but I did pack up the things he won't be able to play with or wear, and set the things he will use out in as cute as possible ways.

My family spoiled me that weekend too, since they all came up (well, all the women) and my sister and sister-in-law planned the whole thing. My sister, my mom, and my Mema, stocked my fridge and took me out to eat and took me to baby stores. It was a lot of fun to be with them, and it made me a little sad to see them try so hard to love me that weekend. I'm going to miss them a lot when we move, because it is so much farther away and I don't know how much travel will be possible on our limited budget.
Anyway, it was a wonderful weekend and now I better go get some of those plans completed before my spring break completely slips away from me.

spring forward stinks

I am so tired! Not only did I stay up way to late sorting bugs with Andy, but I lost (just like all of you) an hour of sleep. My eyes are burning I'm so sleepy. I tried to take a nap but the neighbors are in their yard playing music. So I'm trying to stay awake until nine when I'll crawl into bed.

However, I do like that is it bright outside later in the evening. It makes me feel like I should get more done. Like grading papers... my grades are due tomorrow because half the semester is over (whoopee!) and I still have two quizzes from each of my six classes to grade. And a few journal entries, which make me wonder why I didn't become a math teacher. Or science. I think I love science more than most high school science teachers I know, so why oh why did I go with the subject that takes the longest to grade and that the majority of the students think is "gay." Even when I pick out books that kids their ages love instead of the dusty old classics!

Okay, I'll stay off that soapbox because I have only nine more weeks with the little boogers and then hopefully when I do have to go back to work, I can find a job teaching older boogers at the community college in Columbia.

do not dispose

I'm getting psyched about non-disposable diapers. Mainly because I found out that a woman I really like has experience with cloth diapers and is very encouraging and helpful. Too bad I'm moving so I won't get to know her better.
Yes, we're moving. To Columbia, Missouri in June when our lease is up. Which is why I hope Nathan comes sooner rather than later (as long as he's ready and healthy though) so I'll have more than a couple weeks to recoup and to say bye to my Okie friends.
Then, once again, we'll be poor. We haven't been poor for two years now and I'm afraid I'm spoiled. We do use a budget, but we're not as rigorous as we should be because we know we always have our savings. But after August... there is no back-up, so I'm trying to get serious now about sticking to that budget (that I begged for for years... what was I thinking?). It is becoming more difficult to stay within the grocery budget and Andy increased the amount when I first noticed that groceries were getting more expensive. The only thing lately that I've seen drop is Blue Bell ice-cream, and I was happy for that, but I'd rather have cheaper milk and eggs please. AND FRUIT! Why is fruit so much? I could get tons of junk food for the amount of pseudo-healthy food I try to get for me and Andy. I say pseudo-healthy because I still have to force myself most of the time to eat most veggies. Well, it is late and Andy is ready to go (we were sorting bugs for his master's project) so I'll finish this tomorrow.

throwing punches

I'm now at the end of my 27th week of pregnancy and Nathan is moving like a crazy hyperactive kid who sees a lollipop. I notice when he isn't moving rather than when he is. And now, amazingly, I can feel him at both sides of my stomach simultaneously. I'm not sure what he's doing, but it feels like he's stretching.
Tomorrow is my glucose screening test and I hope Nathan has grown enough to where my doctor can tell me sometime about how he's growing, like if he is a big or small baby so far.

the 25 list

Or, if Nellie did it, so will I.

1. This I stole from her list: If I weren't a teacher, I would be a chef... actually I would be a baker who would specialize in pastries that look like fried eggs but are danishes with cream and apricot halves. Come over, I'll make you one.

2. I love lattes. Not plain coffee, lattes. I don't know why foamed milk makes me so happy.

3. Speaking of milk, I have to have it, I drink about a gallon a week, but only Braum's one percent.

4. My favorite two places in the world are, first, Alaska, and second, Austria, for much of the same reasons: the food is delicious, the temperature perfect (at least in the summer when I went), the views breath-taking, and the people are rustic and friendly.

5. I enjoy blowing my nose or peeing when my bladder is really really full.

6. I get sick of taking showers, it's so boring.

7. I despise making the bed, but I get on to Andy if he doesn't arrange the decorative pillows correctly.

8. Andy is my favorite person. We're such a good match that being mad at him or away from him for too long feels like I'm missing an appendage.

9. I like watching movies by myself.

10. I lust over expensive fabrics and yarns and furniture.

11. I get a kick out of being green, because I feel like I'm taking care of God's creation, and caring for my poor neighbors around the world by using less -- but it makes me feel guilty because I drive a billion miles to work each day.

12. I like to make voices for animals, mostly my dogs and I've started doing it to my unborn son too, and making them have conversations with each other. Usually Andy just stares at me.

13. I don't like recommending books to people b/c it's a let down.

14. which means, I get obsessively into stories and I'm hurt when others don't.

15. I'm very nostalgic and I have a great memory.

16. I miss my family all the time.

17. I feel weird because I love some people so much, and so I'm awkward and quiet around them.

18. I imagine my children as grown-ups. I imagine the future often.

19. My favorite dessert is banoffee tart.

20. My favorite meal would be a latte, eggs, turkey sausage, and french toast with blueberries.

21. I love earrings. BIG ones.

22. My favorite time is Saturday morning, slowly waking up next to Andy.

23. I love my dogs, but they get on my nerves. However, I can't sleep without them or Andy home.

24. I love to sing. More than most know.

25. I'm intensely thankful for my life and I hope I always will be, no matter what. But it's easy to be thankful now.

movie manners

Last night Andy took me to see The Day the Earth Stood Still because, he figured, we might only have a couple of months to still enjoy a movie out together. I liked the movie, but it could have been better. I'm not going to pick it apart because I don't feel that I gave the movie the attention it is due, if it is to be criticized. This is because, horror of all horrors, someone had bad movie manners and I had a bad attitude. The first wrong committed was sitting directly behind me. The heater was broken in this theater and so not many people were in it, in fact, when we showed up only one other family was there and maybe five families total came to the show. So why did this family have to sit directly behind us? And, put their feet up on the chair next to my head? I figured I would get over this, and I probably would have, if they had movie manners from then on. But nooooooooooo. The least offensive thing was their chewing popcorn, slurping drinks, and digging for candy in their plastic wrappers (i.e. making a lot of noise) during the scenes where there is little or no sound. Directors do this for effect, to build suspense, to move you closer to your boy toy or to the edge of your seat, NOT to be annoyed at people happily, but noisily, munching food. When you're in a movie, you're supposed to be in the moment, not worried about shoving food in your face! I don't mind people eating in the theater as long as they do the noisy parts either during the previews (like I did) or during the loud parts of the movie, such as when things are being blown up. The worst offense was that one member of this family, the person sitting behind me and on my right, laughed at the most inappropriate moments. She would make a grunt-like scoffing "humph" every time something awful was happening to someone or to mankind. One time she made two laugh-grunts, and think this is when people were being eaten my those revelation style grey insects or maybe it was when the alien killed a police officer by ramming a car into him. I almost got up and moved, but, chicken as I was, I only complained to Andy about it in a whisper. You may be surprised to know that this isn't my worst movie experience (did I tell you about the time I grabbed a kid's leg because he was rhythmically kicking the back of my chair -- I didn't even turn around, I just reached behind my chair, held his foot for a second and then let go. I'm sure I freaked the kid's poor mother out) and I did actually enjoy my evening out with Andy. We had a good laugh about it earlier. The movie itself, however, didn't produce much discussion. We talked about other doom and gloom alien movies (alien movies are the only scary or suspenseful movies I love) and about the laugh-grunt lady. The only thing I noted from the movie is that the alien seemed to change his mind because of the behavior of the little boy, not his step-mom's as the movie seems to lead you to think. Because, really, his was the boy's behavior that changed, not the woman's. So, I liked it. It wasn't the best alien movie by far, but the special effects are worth the two hours you'll spend.

it's been awhile

I have had things to write. It's just getting on the computer, which I sometimes hate, and being awake enough hours in the day whlie at home. It seems like whenever I'm not at work, or driving to work, I'm sleeping. In fact, that's what I would like to do now -- sleep. But, I'm trying to stay awake to finish up a few last minute Christmas presents. I didn't even start the journals I was going to embroider, and I'm haven't picked up the baby blankets in months, but I have knitted about a billion (well, eight) scarves. And they are soft and/or pretty. Which would you choose? Soft or pretty? It would probably depend on the time of day and my mood.

all in a day's work

A shrew's, the smallest mammal, heart beats at one thousand beats per minute.
An elephant's, I think the second largest mammal, beats at thirty beats per minutes.
I love shrews and elephants. But I love baby more.
Baby's heart beats at one hundred and fifty beats per minute as of yesterday.

In four weeks from yesterday, December 23rd, I'll see baby again in my next ultrasound, where I will see if baby is a boy or a girl. A Nathan or a Charlotte?

Today's work is baking sweet potatoes (with bacon and cheese instead of a sweet topping) and cleaning out from under the bed. Andy can't stand things to be under there, and I don't put things under there unless we have surprise visitors. And then, of course, I forget about it and it stays under there for months. So I promised him I would take care of it today...
But now I'm going to take a nap. It's 10:30 and that's the perfect time to take a nap when you have a day off from work. And then, another one at 3pm is also nice. This morning's work was going through a big bin of fabric scraps that my mom left me. She left it for me to go through and then return, but I'm thinking I may keep it. I found so many sets that could be cute pieced pillows or one huge crazy quilt. So after I clean under the bed, and after I take my first nap, and after I stick the potatoes in the oven, out comes the sewing machine.
I love being at home.

getting fatter every day

My mom and sister spoiled me by buying me tons of maternity clothes, which I needed because my lower abdomen magically expanded in my sleep. Just two weeks ago I could still wear my jeans, and then last week I couldn't button them, and now I can't wear them at all. People notice that my ice-cream belly is bigger, but that is because my baby belly is popping out underneath it.

Mom and I also bought some cute fabric for the baby room. All in all the fabric and the bigger belly made me feel like the baby is really coming. OK, I just slept three hours and it is only 8:30 and I need to go back to sleep. Cheese Whiz, baby making is hard work!

.

I'm not feeling so hot. I feel funny during the day and then sick at night. I go to bed at nine and wake up naturally at five thirty. I'm an old woman!

And I stopped watching Ugly Betty. It's not as funny as it was -- Samantha Who? is much better, I think.

This past weekend Andy and I spend exactly 24 hours in Dallas to watch my brother's boxing match -- the firemen vs. the police officers. The judges gave the match to the other guy, but my brother did very well (esp since he's new at this and the other guy ((we went to middle school with him)) has been boxing since middle school) and totally took his opponent down in the first round. He looked pretty scary out there and we were all very proud of him. Also during that night, his son and my nephew, Max, barfed down both of my arms and in my mouth. Yeah. my mouth.
And the poor kid was hungry and exhausted and couldn't fall asleep in the loud arena. It really made me excited about May, let me tell you. But I loved having time with my family.

baby pics

I saw baby today

Andy and I saw our baby today with our first sonogram. It was amazing. In fact, I couldn't stop laughing so Tom had a hard time finding an image of the baby. He was like, "this won't work if you're laughing" with a grand-dad look on his face, which made me laugh all the more. And, thank the Lord, having a friend from the church, and an elder at that, as your OBG, wasn't wierd at all. I still didn't like being in a skimpy orange plaid apron thingy, or being poked and prodded, but I DID NOT care because I saw baby. And, baby is alone in my womb, just one little one in there. And not a monster baby like I thought (because below the belt I'm HUGE)but an average little fetus. Andy asked Tom if he could tell anything about the baby at this stage and Tom was like, "well, it has a head." Which made me laugh again.
But I mostly laughed because baby kicked its stumpy legs (Lord let them grow like Andy's and not stay stumpy like mine) and kind of bounced.
Then, Tom said it was sucking its thumb, which made me fell a wave of love, because I was notorious for sucking my thumb, and here is my baby, 11 weeks old, and has at least something from me. Besides half my genes, of course.

my awesome brother

Firefighter going in the ring for others
By JOANN LIVINGSTON
Daily Light Managing Editor
Published: Sunday, October 5, 2008 2:33 PM CDT
When the annual Guns and Hoses benefit boxing tournament comes around, Jacob Cooper will be one of two firefighters representing Waxahachie Fire Department.

The annual event’s card showcases firefighters boxing against law enforcement, with the money raised going toward a fund that assists the families of fallen public servants.

Cooper was one of about 28 selected from more than 140 who applied to participate in this year’s event, set for Nov. 8 at Resistol Arena in Mesquite.
Signups are in late spring, with an evaluation held in August to determine who will participate and who will be matched against whom.

Last year’s event, the sixth annual tournament, saw more than 6,000 people in attendance.

“It’s something I’ve always wanted to do. Now, I’ll get to say I did it,” said Cooper, a four-year Navy veteran who joined the Waxahachie department about seven months ago. A member of A shift, he’ll be joined in the tournament by C shift member Scott Safford.

“We encouraged Jacob to do it. It’s a great benefit to participate in,” said Waxahachie-based trainer Daniel Ortiz, who the past several years has worked with several police officers – Jeff Askin of Grand Prairie Police Department, George Williams of Ellis County Sheriff’s Office and Larry Wise of Cedar Hill Police Department. Those officers weren’t boxing this year, so Ortiz has taken on Cooper’s training regimen.

“It takes a lot of time and dedication,” Ortiz said, noting that Cooper began working out the first of July with a goal of peaking for the tournament.

As the weeks have progressed, the training has become more intense.

“He’s in good shape – he’s a firefighter – but he has to get into boxing shape,” Ortiz said, noting the workouts include both aerobic and anaerobic conditioning, all focused toward enabling Cooper to do his best during his match.

The workouts, which can last up to 1 1/2 hours, include sprints, jogging, biometric work, shadow boxing, speed bags and hitting bags, resistance band work, focus mitts and sparring.

“This is a lot harder,” Cooper said of the conditioning as compared to the physical rigors of firefighting. “It’s at a different level.”

Each fight is set up for three, one-minute rounds, with the participants wearing headgear and 20-ounce gloves.
“They’re very careful with the fighters and match them up based on size and experience,” Ortiz said, noting, however, it is serious boxing and some participants in the past have suffered knockouts and broken noses, ribs or hands.

“I want Jacob to be confident, not overconfident, when he goes into the ring,” Ortiz said. “Your worst enemy is to be overconfident. I want him to be on his toes and moving and throwing at the same time. What ultimately matters is what’s in his heart and head.”

The benefit is heavily supported because of the good cause it funds.

“Everyone is 100 percent behind it,” Ortiz said.

There’s an odd number of matches on the card and either the firefighters or law enforcement side will be declared the overall winner at the end of the evening.

“The series is tied at three each,” Cooper said of the six years so far. “This year, we plan on winning.”

“They’re all heroes, although one side may think it’s a bigger hero than the other,” Ortiz said with a smile about the traditional rivalry between the two public service entities. “There’s a lot of friendly jibing back and forth in the weeks leading up to the week, but, that night, they’re not talking much. They’re all serious about wanting to win.

“It’s a big honor to coach these guys – police officers or firefighters,” Ortiz said. “It’s a big compliment to be asked to help these guys out.”

It’ll be Cooper’s first boxing match in a ring. Although he boxed a little on ship while in the Navy, this will be his first boxing match in a ring before a crowd, which he said will include his family, friends and fellow A shift members.

Fire Chief David Hudgins has given his blessing, as well, Cooper said of the support he’s received.

“I plan on doing my share to win the trophy for the firefighters’ side,” he said.

For sponsorship information and tickets on the boxing event, visit online at gunsandhosesboxing.com.

talk to your parents

Thanks, Tim. ;)